apology and a prayer

gosh everything that I have done yesterday went wrong, it is getting more difficult to control myself. I knew the result, I knew that it is going wrong, but I can't stop doing this. Gosh I made my loved ones down. I wanna apologize, but I don't know how

I know that I am getting more arrogant time to time. I don't wanna be like this. But I can't help being like this. Please if there is GOD, help me with this